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Alt Cover (Sunshine 3)

My other codename for Sunshine was LadybirdBox because it's a story about a complicated mother/daughter relationship and also about a young woman whose entire life is about to be turned upside down...

Alan Gray and Minnow Dory

I know I already did one for Minnow but I like to put everyone in pairs. I feel like with each thing I write I am trying to do justice for putting Minnow in a refrigerator in Veritas. I see them  as cartel old guards who are good at what they do. I do kind of imagine Alan a little (for lack of a better word) pussywhipped.

CPShawna: Mmhm, but why is Alan's picspiration so much younger ?
SHV: It's an android thing ? I like the idea of him deciding to look younger and for Minnow to be with a man who appears younger.

My picspiration for older Alan is Paul Walker. I don't know how to write this out but so many of my picspirations have died young. Anton Yelchin was my Sawyer piscpiration, Paul Walker for Alan and I had Cameron Boyce as a picspiration for Noah Presley in Liberation.

Luce/Haley/Grayson

Luce's picspiration is a model I found on Pinterest who is close-ish, I imagine Luce with a little less gray hair and  less of a full on beard but  more stubble. Luce isn't happy about his cybernetics not working but I imagine him generally content with his life. Also for such a tough character, he is a total mama's boy.

Haley's closest picspiration for me has always been this photoshoot the model Emil (yes, Emil!) Andersson did in the early 2010's so I just imagine him looking a little bit older than this.

When I was looking for these images again  I came across what Emil looks like now and actually he's still a pretty perfect inspy (CHEEKBONES!). I think Emil is probably in his late twenties or early thirties but it works for Older!Haley.

It's hard for me to come up with an exact one for Grayson but his hair is supposed to be kind of a long undercut like this:

I'm not going to say much about the Luce/Haley/Grayson situation because I kind of wrote two prequel short stories about it....I'll probably share them sooner than later. I'd love to write prequels for everyone I just need some ideas.

Also, these are the types of Japanese tattoos that Rias and Charlotte have:

Sunshine 3
After a disagreement with her parents about  not getting the same chances Kenji is getting El runs away from home for the night. She goes into the Sprawl and is spending the night in the apartment Luce, Haley and Sara share and wakes up to see a news broadcast about her family's mansion on fire.

Sunshine 3
Playlist
-1- Heaven I Know by Gordi
-2- Rattle by Penny and Sparrow
-3-  Capsize by Grace Grundy

Picspircations (Sunshine 2)

 

It is picspiration time!  As I do these picspirations I'm going to include some headcanon suff.

The Washington Sisters

These models are from Pinterest, I don't know who they are. The two for Angel and Atsumi  look a little old but they have the mischievous vibes I imagine for the girls. Angel was a placeholder names but I decided to keep it and have her named after an Angelfish thus continuing the fish themed naming Jean Dory and Minnow Dory have.

The main reason I had to fudge the ages and retcon stuff from Burn was because I wanted El to be 18-years-old so I could do more adult stuff with her character.

The Parents

I love Gennifer Goodwin for Charlotte and it is really hard to find one for Rias but Steven Yeun in a few years is pretty close. In my headcanon Charlotte is 41 and Rias is turning 39. Charlotte parenting-style  is definitely overcompensating for how much of a "free range parent" Jean was for her.

The Grandparents 

Sara Grace is 68 and I imagine her a lot like Frances McDormand. In my head Sara is working through some stuff about having been an assassin and killed so many people for a living.

Jean Dory is 61 and has some real Jeff Goldblum energy and (since this doesn't come up) has been retired for a decade but lives at Virtue.

Minnow is 53 and I imagine her as a sultry, work hard play hard  Marisa Tomei type. I also see her as kind of the cool aunt / mentor figure for Charlotte and Rias

I have some aesthetics for the other characters but we'll save those for next time!

Sunshine 2
So, I realize with the way I have this written I left more questions out there than answers but I appreciate your nitpicks, it helps me see things in a better way. It is SO hard because I have this all written out (including the blog posts) so I don't want to get  too ahead of myself.

Recap
18-year-old Eloise "El" Washington and her sisters have a little too much fun before going to be with their father when he gets out of brain surgery. They learn they have a neoluddite cousin named Kenji who is is in town. Their dad comes out of surgery and they all head to their family beach house for his birthday party.

Sunshine 2 ( I fixed the tiny font)
Playlist 

-1- Cymbidium by WMD 
-2- No Excuses by Meghan Trainor
-3- Sit, Still Look Pretty by Daya 
-4- Run Away by Killa Manila

Let's Try Something New (Sunshine 1)

LSAM
In my documents Pulse is called LSAM which stands for Let's Solve A Murder! This serial came about after I wrote about Luce/Isla's interaction in Built for Sin and I just wanted to write a little more of how they relate being the two people closest to Haley...and then it got away from me. I wanted to try my hand at mystery, explore a little Rias/Charlotte and  fill in some other gaps.

I'm not sure how I got it all out but I did and I somehow developed Sunshine in the process.

The Name Game
I mentioned in the comment sections I have a character name document from 2009 I sometimes refer to. I'm going to share part of it.

This is a group  of names that I guess Past!Shawna thought were good male protagonist names:

As you can see Past!Shawna underlined Grey (this later became Alan Gray), Rayne and Luce for Veritas.

• Felix was used for Harlow's friend in Sundays/Compulsion
• Milo was used  one of the mimics in Mimic
• Griffin was used for one of Rayne's bodyguards in Vice
• Shad....I think was used in Veritas when they go to Neoluddite land ?
• Blackbird was used for a blackmarket doctor in Veritas and Vice

IDK if I like any of these other names all that much anymore...

Okay, this was fun I'm going to do one more:

These were my "soft girl" names (yes, yes all of the sections are color-coded in a super stereotypical gendered way.)

Twyla and Isla became main characters. I used Persephone in Compulsion for a bartender at Luxor. I think Harley inspired Harlow...I've used a lot less of these.

Sunshine
So, let's move on to Secret!Vice aka Sunshine. I started writing Sunshine in January 2019 and it REALLY got away from me. What started as a one scene flash fic has turned into a 26k+ serial shaped thing

Sunshine and Pulse have kind of informed each other in a way so it's weird to be writing Sunshine "solo" now.  It has morphed a lot as I've pushed my own boundaries and just went there with character decisions. Of course all of that means nothing to you all since you have no idea what it is about so let's get into it. You will notice right of the bat I accidentally stole a name from Lile. I literally didn't realize it until a few days ago....

Sunshine 1

Sunshine 1
Playlist
-1- Good as Hell by Lizzo (This was the first song on the playlist...I totally had it before Kirsten Gillebrand)
-2- Most Girls by Hailee Steinfield
-3- Room 4 by 36
-4- Mama Say by Betty Who

More Memes + Double Chapter Post (Pulse 8 and 9)

So, Vice has 11 serials/short stories/novellas and I feel this Tweet on a deep level. Sara and Alan have really been pushed into the background!

The exact reason I go on long hiatuses:

Me with my UL short story

 

Maxwell/Haley in Sundays:

 It Me:

I feel personally attacked by this one :

 This one sums up the biggest problem I'm having with Secret!Vice:

Character names have been hard for me these last few years but it's been really difficult for these last few short stories. I'm 2024k in Secret!Vice and characters still have placeholder names for side characters I need to change. I have a document from 2009 (😱) with a list of names I like and I've actually reached the point where I've exhausted the list. So...yeah, I related to this meme.


I sort of love these memes because I didn't make any of them or Google for specific ones but I relate so hard to nearly everyone. I never thought of these serials as "real writing" but maybe they are ? Okay, that's enough giggles back to murder!

Pulse 8 + 9
Our first Double chapter post!!!

Recap
Haley pays an at home visit to his new client, a well known priest. Luce learns that Linz was a paid informant for the government and after looking at a timeline Haley created of Linz's location before the murder Luce questions Charlotte about why she may or may not have murdered Linz.

Playlist 
Chapter 8
-1- Falling by Animal Feelings

Chapter 9
-1- Can't Hold A Candle by Brennin Hunter
-2- Say it First by Sam Smith
-3- Patient by Carolina Pennell
-4- Anywhere by Attom

Suing 1D (Pulse7)

 

I didn't know much when I go started on Pulse but I knew I wanted to write this collar pin in somehow.

Dear Lile,

I think you may have to sue Liam Payne and Rita Ora because this music video has some SERIOUS Litany Lane vibes. Tattoos aside:

CPShawna: Why...why were you looking at that music video ?
SHV: The 50SG soundtracks have been music finding gold

I'm trapped in this meme right now with Secret!Vice...memes post incoming:

Pulse 7

Pulse 7
Recap
Luce figures out  Linz was seeing someone named Fisher Cross at the Magnolia restaurant and confirms his identity with the sommelier, but then he has a malfunction with his cybernetics and forgets everything.  He never said the name to outloud and is now back to the drawing board....

PLAYLIST
-1- Overwhelmed by Trevor Ransom
-2- last piece by Lykke Li
-3- Bibo no Aozora by Riyuchi Sakamoto
-4- Take Me To Church by Tomas Lee

Better (Pulse 6)

Dear Lile,

This image gave me serious Paris Prince vibes (I think Cillian's looks the best/most natural). My next few posts are going to have some Dear Lile sections but that's just because if I come across something that doesn't work to me I immediately go see if it applies to the Lile-verse.

I have a type and it’s called TORTURED JAWLINE. pic.twitter.com/sKyH8P2iAF

— Victoria/V.E. Schwab (@veschwab) March 21, 2019

 
Onwards and Upwards
Keanu Reeves is having a year and after watching him in the trailer for the new videogame Cyberpunk 2077 I can totally see him in the Vice-verse.

Looking into the video game trailer led me to this interesting thread about how much of cyberpunk is stepped in late 80's xenophobia about Japanese domination. It's interesting to me because I never saw it that way but now I 100% see it. There is a lot of Orientalism in cyberpunk...particularly in films like Bladerunner. It's just something I'm thinking about. I think it must have been in the back of my head, because I intentionally added other "ethnic mafias" to Vice but I never fully unpacked what was going on in the genre.


Speaking of learning new things, if I had known the words when I started writing Haley's probably would have been nonbinary. I don't know if I mentioned this before but, in my head he is gender nonconforming but identifies as male.

Not a fun blog post but some thoughts on my mind. I want to do a gif post but I don't have much to say and I really want to keep Secret!Vice....erm, secret ?  I have no idea why.

Recap
Haley and Luce pay a visit to Linz's mom and discover her mother doesn't know she is dead and  is still talking to Linz over chat messages.

Pulse 6 
Playlist
-1- Dusty Window by Caponium 
-2-  Doria Island Song by Olafur Arnalds

It me

(I've had this post drafted forever so we're just going to get right into it)

Luce and Minnow
If you remember where we last left off it was a slap slap kiss *and then some* between Luce and Minnow. When I say I've been writing the tension in their relationship for a while I really mean it. This is from early in Vice when Minnow and Jean take Alan out after surviving the nuclear warning.

“Have fun spending the night with mommy,” Minnie coos in a baby voice, bending her finger at Luce.

I noticed him for the first time in the room. He was sitting on the floor in the corner, surrounded by a series Holoscreens.

“I’ll go too.” He says quietly and stands up to join us.

I barely recognize his voice because it is the first time I’ve heard him speak when he isn’t screaming or yelling.

 “Yeah, right. Isn’t it past your bedtime ? ” Minnie laughs as she jerks his arm and messes up his mass of hair.

“Shut up, I’m only 3 years younger than you.”  He retorts, harmlessly pushing her hand away.

Luce turns to Jean who is standing up by the door.

 “Let me come , Jean.” He says

“Eh, maybe sit this one out little brother,” Jean replies with a weak smile .

“Don’t be ma-aaa-d.” Minnie teases in a sing song voice. “C’mere I’ll give you a goodnight  kiss !”

She put her arms around him and holding him tight, leans in to kiss his neck.

“Stop. Get away from me!” Luce screams  trying to squeeze out of her grasp.

“Is the little baby having a tantrum ? It must be way past your bedtime ,” she baby-talks again and starts to go for his lips.

“Stop it !” Luce continue as he  finally wrestles himself of her arms.

“Aww,” she coos, grazing her fingernails over his face.” Are you going to cr-“

Before she can finish the back of his hands flies across her face. Hard.

.....

“Crazy bastard.” She mumbles when we hit the main street and I can feel the upcoming buzz of people.

“You know, baby , you need to just leave him alone, sometimes.” Jean sighs

“Oh, sure take his side,” she mumbles. “ He is such a spoiled brat.”

“It’s pasta ala vodka ala moi !,” Minnow shrieks to me holding out a spoon.

“Shut.Up.” Luce grumbles at her from the corner of the room where he is sitting and staring.

“C’mon Alan ! Try it ! I don’t know why it doesn’t have actual vodka in it, so I put some in!,” she continues even louder.

I take the spoon and taste it, it’s good and I can still taste the remnants of the alcohol.

“I like it.” I say quietly.

“Yay!” She giggles. “I just NEVER know, so I’m glad you give me your opinion instead of being a little bitch.”

And that does it.

Luce storms over to Minnie and before she can react, grabs her little gun off her hip and goes for she and Jean's bedroom....Luce ignores everyone else in the room and puts three shots into Minnie's vanity mirror before Sara pins him to the ground and takes the gun. Minnie's vanity mirror cracks until it falls off in three disjointed pieces.


- Vice Chapter 5

“You are going to leave this house and you’re going to walk around, I don’t care if it kills you,” Sara Grace shouts as she opens the door. She waits for Minnow and I to walk out before pushing Luce behind us and slamming the door shut.
Luce throws a closed fist at the door.
“Are you going to cry ?,” Minnie teases him and pinches his cheek.
He tries to hit her , but she ducks under his hand and kisses his cheek. He shoves her into the concrete wall and she kicks his fake leg and even though she changed out of the stilettos the kick causes him to buckle down. He raises his fist to hit her face and I grab it.
“Let’s just go and get this over with,” I say, releasing him. 
 He flips me off.

This is from Sweet Prince:

Aunt Minnie approaches where I am standing awkwardly beside Luce...She has a tray of sparkling shots in her hand, but her eyes look haunted. She’d been Rayne’s assistant for 17 years. She’d been by his side until they very end.
Aunt Minnie makes a really crude joke about Rayne as she approached us; Luce laughs and take a shot. I take one too.
“Rayne Washington would want everyone to be wasted off their fucking asses by now,” Aunt Minnie says throwing back her shot.
“Hell, he’d be standing on the table beating his chest if he was here,” Luce adds taking another shot from her tray.
“This is our time,” Aunt Minnie says in a mimic of Rayne’s roar. “THIS IS OUR TIME!”
Luce laughs.
It was odd watching them get along, normally they were snipping back and forth like little kids.

There are a few more but you get the gist.

WIP  Update
Two years ago I wouldn't have thought I'd have any more WIPs but here we are. I'm all done with Pulse. My next Secret!Vice project is sitting at 17 19k. I also have about 6,000 words of flash fictions that go with it.  It's odd...it feels like something I'm writing just for me and the weird way my brain works but I am excited to share it...but first we need to wrap this up.

I'm also trying to close the loop on this UL and Sentinel thing....It's just not clicking ):


Recap
It's been a while so I'm going to recap what you need to know for this chapter. 

Isla Haley has been accused of murdering former Control bartender and current Virtue escort Linz Sharpe aka Lindsay Schofield. Luce and Haley start looking for answers against the cartel's orders and along the way Luce realizes Linz was a school friend of Charlotte Dory's and she had a crush on him when they were young.

At first Haley thinks Luce is responsible for the murder because he was there and missing on the footage. But when he discovers Luce was out buying him a gift during the murder they have makeup sex that is promptly interrupted by Minnow Dory. 

Also, Luce's cybernetics have started acting up...

Oh, Also, Gaige, a dominant at Control sets Haley up with on a new mystery client who specifically requested Haley.....

Pulse 5 
-1- Baer by Laminate Pet Animal
-2- MMXV by Jonas Hain
-3- In The Waiting by Kina Grannis 


" Minnow unzips her purse and hands me a little old fashioned key that looked like it was from a storybook.“That hideous cabinet behind the desk is a liquor cabinet.” She says. “Let’s have some real fun, boys.” "

Pulse 5
Playlist

New Boys In Town

I was re-reading S&A a while ago  and I came across the post where Lile, in a Q&A, gives us the quote above. I'm going to start being our serial historian.





Unproblematic Faves
Dear Lile, since we cancelled Rick Fox , I have just discovered actor Rome Flynn:

He seems very Emile-ish

Including the Clierro nonsense side-eye

Also, yes, yes, since I have also cancelled Jared Leto for being creepy to his Suicide Squad cast members I can see my Jean inspy being Robert Sheehan with a flat iron:

I mean

This pose in particular I find very Jean-like

Pulse Chapter 4

Playlist
-1- On An Island
-2- Bibo No Azora
-3- Turn Me On by

Recap
When Isla Haley is accused of murdering Virtue escort Linz Sharpe, Haley and Luce decide to investigate behind the cartel's back. Haley steals the client lists from that night from Jean while Luce goes to look at Linz's body. He learns from Alan she was stabbed with a knife from MBC's Casablanca collection and the stabbing occurred postmortem. Alan tasks a begrudging Alan Grey with figuring out what killed her.
Pulse 4
This chapter goes a little off the rails, but stick with me....

Less Dorito Chip ?

Body Inspy
Not that anybody asked but in my head Luce's body inspy is swole Chris Evans. It was grueling research to find these important images but I did it.

Although actually I imagine Luce being broader in the waist and having less of the Dorito chip shape.


Who Am I ?
So...Pulse is all drafted out and I'm 17,000 words into Future!Vice. Speaking of, Future!Vice it is sort of turning into my magnum opus of sorts...I have three flash fictions that go with it...And that's the last I'll talk about it until I'm closer to sharing it.

I should probably be working on TLS but I want to give this UL thing a once over because it is killing me that I wrote 3,000 good words in Summer 2017 and have just been starting at it. I've been doing some re-reading of UL3 and if I could re-write it I would. It's got so much drama. But I think having those soap operatic drama moments are apart of the series so I may put some of that into the UL short story.

Chapter 3
It's so strange to have this serial divided into "chapters" because I didn't really write with chapters in mind. Somebody asked me how this serial fit into Bright Lines and all I can say, without confusing myself, is that Haley has been at Control for a few years now.

Recap
The cartel takes Isla Haley into custody for the murder of Linz Sharpe, an escort at Control. Haley is upset at Luce for siding with the cartel and they take a break. Luce talks to Isla and she explains that when she left Linz was alive. Luce talks to Charlotte and looks at the security footage then goes to Control and tells Haley he will help him find the actual murderer. 

Chapter 3
Playlist
-1-  Lost In A Sea of Pillow and Blankets
-2- Hurricane
-3- Fyrsta

One More Meme....

Literally me everytime Lile talks about liking United Light:

United Light is just such a crazypants story, that wanders all over the place and is just too much at times. It feels soap opera-y in the worst way because I just didn't know how to end it.  I do like Liberation better, but it also feels like a lot of messy moving parts. I was doing a lot of cartwheels to make the timelines work.

Character Inspys
I only have a few of these and none of them are spot on but have similar vibes. It's funny, I actually like that the younger Vice characters are in their late 20's to early 40's. They get to be the ones in charge instead of being under someone else.



Luce

So, Luce has some serious Richard Madden in Bodyguard vibes. Particualarly him in this lighting  but...less pretty boy.

I see his coloring as closer to Sam Heughan. I sort of love his smile in this picture.

Haley
The closest I could find for Haley is the model Emil Anderson but...more pretty boy.

And I imagine his hair length more like this:

Charlotte
She will always be a young Zoey Deschanel but with jet black hair and the bluntest of bangs.

Rias
I also found this model who looks a lot like Rias

Ashley Greene is my forever Minnow and she's actually around the age Minnow would be but Ashley has gone more blonde.

 This throwback is close to how I imagine her:

 

Recap

Luce is ordered to take Isla Haley captive for the murder of Linz Sharpe, a escort at Virtue. Haley and Luce get in a fight about it and Haley walks away from Luce to solve the murder on his own.

Chapter 2

Playlist

-1- Saman

-2- Interstellar

-3- Read My Mind by Raphealla